Possibilities

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I will turn 37 in a little over two months. The last thirteen years have been spent in two long-term relationships…just not long enough I guess. A new ending means a new beginning. With a new year around the corner, I’m looking at the possibilities that are now out there for me. Maybe I should rephrase that.

I’m open to the possibilities that are out there.

And really, sometimes it’s about being open to possibilities, and not the possibilities themselves, that’s important.

I see possibility in projects I’ve been working on and thinking about. I see possibility in the potential for these projects to move me along towards a career that is more suited to me. I see the possibility to express myself in ways that I haven’t for most of my life. I see the possibility of others being able to relate to what I have to say.

I’ve thought about the possibility of dating again. The conclusion that I’ve come to is that I’m just not going to rush that right now. Not because I don’t want to date but because I believe that when the time is right, I will meet someone special. I know that it’s possible to find someone who will appreciate me for me. The geek. The philosopher. The jokester. The romantic. The gardener. The cook. The reader. The writer. The smartass. The sensitive soul. The cuddler. All the little things that go into making ME. There is someone out there who will find all that irresistible.

I’ve ignored the possible for many years because I lost sight of it. I stopped believing that it was possible to be with someone who would accept me as I am, the good and the bad. I stopped believing it was possible to do the thing I love, write, because I didn’t have the support of the one person who I really needed it from. I stopped believing it was possible to be really happy because all I could see were the compromises and sacrifices I made for others that went unappreciated or ignored.

That has all changed now.

Life is about changes. I’ve certainly had enough of them to have at least learned that lesson by now. I haven’t always done well with change. Some changes I fought tooth and nail. Other changes I accepted easily. I can tell you that ten years ago, I didn’t see myself where I am now. My roadmap has changed and I need to take a closer look at it. It’s my map now and the possibilities are endless if I keep an open mind. I’ve got time. I don’t need to rush down the first fork in the road that I see. I think I’m just going to stroll for awhile and enjoy the view, enjoy the possibilities that present themselves.

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