Prop 8: Playing the Broken Record

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You know what starts tomorrow? No? Well, let me tell you. Another trial on Prop 8. I know I don’t need to explain what that is by now. If I do, well, you’ve clearly been living under a rock. Google it.

You sick of hearing about this issue? Well, I’m sick of being told I don’t have the right to get married. I’m sick of being told any relationship I might have with someone I love isn’t valid because she doesn’t have a penis. I’m sure a lot of you would like us all to shut up about this. After all, it seems to be all we talk about. If you think that’s true, maybe you should question why that is.

“Here she goes again,” you say. “Why can’t you just be happy with the rights you DO have. I mean, what’s so great about being able to get married?” Wow. Did you really just ask that? When was the last time the medical benefits for your spouse was taxed as income? When was the last time someone told you your relationship was an unnatural abomination that was a threat to the human species? Yeah, I didn’t think so.

If you want me and every other gay person to shut up, I suggest you get behind the whole equal rights thing. I mean, it is the fair thing to do. Shall I paint a more personal picture for you? Fine. When my ex and I were together and she was on my medical benefits, it got tacked onto my income. I wasn’t allowed to file Federal taxes as Married or Head of Household even though I was. No. It didn’t matter that I supported my ex and her two kids. It didn’t matter that I was the only one with an income. I’m good enough for the Feds to tax me, but my relationship wasn’t good enough to be recognized.

Now, I know there are a lot of you who support marriage equality, and for that I say thank you. There are others of you who say you don’t care either way because it doesn’t affect your life one way or another. To that audience I say this: not caring is just as bad as not supporting equality. Your indifference is one of the reasons this is still an issue.

Then there’s that whole other group. You know, the one’s who support Prop 8. They think that a marriage is only valid if it’s between a man and a woman. Part of their reasoning is that only those relationships result in children. You know what I think of that argument? Complete bullshit. A marriage is about more than producing more humans. Just ask all those couples who don’t or can’t have kids. I don’t see you trying to invalidate their relationships. You claim that allowing us to marry will ruin the family unit and bring the downfall of humanity. That might have a little more credence if there weren’t so many of you tweeting your penises all over the internet or cheating on your spouses. Don’t go playing the God card either. Marriage is a civil act. If you don’t want us getting married in your church, that’s fine because most of us wouldn’t want to anyway.

So, none of those reasons working for you? Try this. What if you, as a heterosexual, could not get married because your relationship wasn’t recognized as valid. What if you faced the same discrimination and hatred that we do on a daily basis? Think you’d shut up about it? Think you wouldn’t be upset when people said “you should be happy with your limited rights”?

Next time you start to cringe or roll your eyes or reach for the remote when marriage equality comes up, think about how you’d feel in our shoes.  You should be concerned that so many people are trying to invalidate loving relationships. You should be concerned that those opposed to marriage equality are doing everything they can to take rights away from us. What stops them from coming up with a reason to take them from you?

 

**dedicated to the chick I plan on marrying someday**

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